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View Full Version : Jacky doesn't whine to his mommy. He whines to yours.


Raziaar
24-04-2008, 05:19 AM
Dear Mrs. Zelnick:

Your son, as you may know (or maybe you don?t know), is Chairman of Take-Two Interactive Software, Inc., whose most popular video games are the Grand Theft Auto murder simulator games banned in some countries but sold to children here.

Your son last week was reported to have said the following about Grand Theft Auto IV, due to be released Tuesday, April 29: ?We?ve already received numerous [GTA IV] reviews, and to a one, they are perfect scores. My mom couldn?t write better reviews?? Taking your son?s thought, I would encourage you either to play this game or have an adroit video gamer play it for you. Some of the latter gamers are on death row, so try to find one out in the civilian population who hasn?t killed someone yet.

What you will see in your son?s game, if this iteration of GTA is anything like its predecessors, is incredible interactive violence aimed at police officers (whom you can shoot in the head and see the blood spray), innocent bystanders (whom you can run over with your car just for the heck of it), and of course the plentiful female prostitutes you can have sex with and then filet with a knife or stomp with your feet in order to get your money back. Experts note that the recent plethora of cop killings is caused in part by your darling son?s entrepreneurial energy. There are three policemen dead in Alabama because of Grand Theft Auto. I was on 60 Minutes about it. I hope Strauss has provided you with a flat screen tv to see the grief of the bereaved families that fills the screen.

The pornography and violence that your son trafficks in is the kind of stuff that most mothers would be ashamed to see their son putting into the hands of other mothers? children, but, hey, your son Strauss has recently assured the world that he is ?a Boy Scout, everybody knows that.? I?d love to see the merit badges that Scout Troop handed out. Is there a Ted Bundy merit badge? If so, your loving son deserves one now. It should be red and green, for obvious reasons.

With Passover having just come and gone, it is appropriate to note the following from the Old Testament, Proverbs 22:6:
?Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.?

Mrs. Zelnick, did you train up your son, Strauss, to make millions of dollars by pushing Mature-rated video games to children? Any kid can go right to little Strauss? corporate web site and buy GTA IV with no age verification. Strauss is even marketing the new Grand Theft Auto IV on World Wrestling Entertainment tv shows seen by millions of kids. If you trained up Strauss to do this, then shame on you.

But maybe the explanation for your son?s corporate sociopathy is to be found in Old Testament Proverb 29:15:
?The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.?

Maybe you, Mrs. Zelnick, were so taken by your handsome son that you spared the rod and spoiled the child. That would explain why he has brought you, by the way he presently acts, ?to shame.?

There?s another mother you would do well to talk to. Mrs. Crump in Alabama had a son who was a police officer. He?s now dead because a teenaged boy unwittingly trained himself to kill him on Grand Theft Auto: Vice City. She has a grief she carries every day that only a mother can know.There are other such mothers in the heartland of America whose inhabitants your son simply sees as commercial targets.

Your son, this very moment, is doing everything he possibly can to sell as many copies of GTA IV to teen boys in the United States, a country in which your son claims you raised him to be ?a Boy Scout.? More like the Hitler Youth, I would say. Happy Mother?s day, Mrs. Zelnick, which this year is May 11, two weeks after your son unleashes porn and violence upon other mothers? boys. I?m sure you?re very proud.

Sincerely, Jack Thompson


Now of course I can't confirm it, but I read it on the gtagaming forums here http://www.gtagaming.com/forums/showthread.php?t=102507

It's an amusing read to say the least, and very bizarre if it's true... Man what a loser.


I love this part

Taking your son?s thought, I would encourage you either to play this game or have an adroit video gamer play it for you. Some of the latter gamers are on death row, so try to find one out in the civilian population who hasn?t killed someone yet.



EDIT: It's off shack news. http://www.shacknews.com/onearticle.x/52358

Kyorisu
24-04-2008, 05:22 AM
Has to be fake.

Combine Hybrid
24-04-2008, 05:23 AM
I thought mr. thompson is more concerned with his about-to-lose attorney license?

Kyorisu
24-04-2008, 05:26 AM
It's funny when you consider GTA has not directly made anyone kill anyone else (we all know this). "Oh I saw they did it on GTA" That's fine but you have to be mentally retarded to try it in real life.

Cpt Tenacious
24-04-2008, 05:29 AM
I was reading it then I got to the middle section and looked at the bottom and saw "Jack Thompson: and lol'd.

Krynn72
24-04-2008, 06:03 AM
I was reading it then I got to the middle section and looked at the bottom and saw "Jack Thompson: and lol'd.

Its a thread in the games section with the name "Jacky" in the title. Who'd you expect it to be? Not only that, but the first line in it has the words "Grand Theft Auto murder simulator" in it. Come on.

AJ Rimmer
24-04-2008, 10:59 AM
"You're familiar with the concept of "shame," right? He can show it to his mother or not, but of course he won't because he wouldn't want his mother to know what he does and how he harms other people's kids."

He's lost it. He really has.

...not that he hadn't before.

Bad^Hat
24-04-2008, 12:22 PM
What a piece of shit. Hope that gave her a good laugh.

TollBooth Willie
24-04-2008, 01:00 PM
I stopped reading after the first two paragraphs. It burns my eyes.

Dodo
24-04-2008, 01:36 PM
i lolled all the way trhough : D
hope he gets killed by someone who played GTA, the irony haha

-dodo

Beerdude26
24-04-2008, 02:11 PM
Wow, he's a gigantic asshole, I hope she sues his ass for that last paragraph:

Your son, this very moment, is doing everything he possibly can to sell as many copies of GTA IV to teen boys in the United States, a country in which your son claims you raised him to be "a Boy Scout." More like the Hitler Youth, I would say. Happy Mother's day, Mrs. Zelnick, which this year is May 11, two weeks after your son unleashes porn and violence upon other mothers' boys. I'm sure you're very proud.

highlander
24-04-2008, 02:28 PM
F*ckin' wow. :|

Bad^Hat
24-04-2008, 03:13 PM
You know what? I'd really like to see someone write a letter like this to his mother. I'll bet you anything it'd get more of a reaction out of him than this does.

VictimOfScience
24-04-2008, 03:24 PM
Hahaha! I really hope this isn't real, but in a way I do hope it is because it is hilarious. Hilarious and very sad.

Tyguy
24-04-2008, 03:29 PM
you can tell he was never able to beat mario, thus taking out his aggression on the gaming world

nurizeko
24-04-2008, 03:32 PM
Assuming his mother is alive/not disowned him, it would be awesome if every game wrote a letter to her condemning her sons abominable behaviour.

Shoes_Buttback03
24-04-2008, 03:35 PM
you can tell he was never able to beat mario, thus taking out his aggression on the gaming world
QFT lawlz. But heres what really happend.

http://www.ctrlaltdel-online.com/comics/20050808.jpg

Jack Thompson really needs to be quit and just go sue something else.

99.vikram
24-04-2008, 06:00 PM
I feel like I just stared at goatse. :x

EDIT: At OP, not the Ctrl+Alt+Del strip.

-Psy-
24-04-2008, 06:01 PM
Yep. The Chairman's Mother should definitely hate her Son for being a well-payed job.

PjB
24-04-2008, 11:32 PM
You know what? I'd really like to see someone write a letter like this to his mother. I'll bet you anything it'd get more of a reaction out of him than this does.

I'd ask her right now, but I don't want to wake her.

Ba-dum-TISH.





/gets coat




Jack Thompson annoys me greatly. The fact that he's a messed up, attention-defecit, lie-mongering cretin with nothing better to do, and is even regarded as a maniac by the Florida Bar, makes me angry enough. But it's also the fact that he's obviously very capable of getting attention on a mass scale that drives me crazy. If he were some random nobody on some insignificant blog, I wouldn't despise him nearly as much.

Wanted Bob
25-04-2008, 04:39 AM
Well, this is going quite far, what a moron. Most of his stuff gets a laugh outa me but this is just wrong...

elkaebee
27-04-2008, 06:58 AM
Jack Thompson.

We all laugh.